People assume that I am not faithful. That I am not Christian. That because I dont belong to a Church of God that I dont have  spiritual guidance.

Truth is I am very devout in my faith. I pray every moment, when I am stressed when I am happy, when I am fearful, when I cry, I talk to God about my day, about my fears and hopes. Most of all I pray for human kind.

Now that seems excessive, so what if I pray! That doesnt mean I am a Christian. No it doesnt. It means I believe God is with me every moment. That when I falter He pick me up.

I sing. I sing his praise. I read his Word. My heart is His Temple.

Sure, I have a strong sexual personalty, but believe it or not I am conservative. I dress modestly. I am pretty much a wallflower lost in a crowd.

So it annoyed me to no end, the entire day I was preached to by my mother that I should return to their church. “You will go to hell. You are not going to church. You are old enough to know better!” she ranted. “You should at least come to Easter service.”

The truth was something about their church set me off. I couldnt stand being in their church. Their preachings about Revelations, their need to be baptised or go to hell was really off.

It didnt help when we went to visit my dad in the hospital and he started in on my getting baptized. I was going to go to hell. Would I please just go to church?!  I sat there, my teeth grinding down on my tongue. I wanted to stay quiet out of respect.

But something reared inside me, I had to defend myself. “I dont want to go to your church!” I bellowed. “I hate it! Your church is depressing! Why would I want to go to a church that teaches about hell!”

They sat in complete silence, stunned by my outburst. “Now Rebecca,” my dad tried to placate me “where do you get that idea? We have a new preacher”

“A new preacher.” my mom agreed.

“He was asked to tone it down abit” my dad went on. “he changed the program around”

I rolled my eyes. Probably was scaring the old people with his happy go lucky sermons

“No” I snapped. “There is nothing wrong with the gospel songs. If you had that in your church you wouldnt be so…”

my parents looked at each other “Rebecca we started singing new songs. There is a young man. He is black.” my mom said. “He leads the youth group!”

My jaw dropped. Wow, that was so racist I was  speechless. “Mom, that family always had great singing voices!”

“You know them!”

I face palmed myself. When a mennonite family adopts outside the colony, people notice! Their mother was a wonderful singer. She could belt it out, I loved listening to her when I went to church. They left when the pastors changed, and I never saw them again.

“Yes. whatever I am not going to your church. I am not going to Easter service!”

“you are not going to Heaven, Auntie” K piped up.

“Yeah well neither are you all” I replied.

Well my parents went on a tangent about how Christians would be the first to go. I decided not to debate any further and tuned them out.

Later my mom asked if I wanted to help clean the church. I agreed. I had nothing better to do.

I was in the middle of cleaning the hallway when my eyes were drawn to the bulletin board outside the pastors’ offices.

Pentagram. Blood Rituals. My eyes widen in disbelief. There were pamphlets on Occult right next to a pamphlet on meeting God.

“Rebecca are you done in the Pastor’s office yet?” my mom asked.

The pastor’s office? Hell no!

I opened the door to the Pastor’s office. There were coca cola paraphernalia everywhere. ugh. Ok.

I started to vacuum. I got closer to the bookshelf.

I dropped the vacuum hose in disbelief.

There were two books on Occult.

Normally, such books would be high up, away from prying eyes. This was eye level.

Now I always joke about my parents church being a cult, but this was ridiculous!

I was creeped out, I felt like I was horribly written horror movie.

Any moment  I kept thinking the pastor might suddenly appear and ask if I wanted a “coke and a talk”

6 thoughts on “A COKE AND A TALK

  1. My spouse has Mt Dew stuff everywhere. Our pastor has a collection of something, I can’t recall what. Sometimes collections help make people more comfortable. The pamphlets might be ways to escape an occult. Unless when you looked at them, they weren’t. I’m sorry you feel this way, Becky. I’m an eclectic church attender. I’ve been a member of several and when I am home I attend mom’s and when I am in Oregon, I attend mine. Different denominations, same love. Sending you mine.


  2. Some of the ‘feelings’ you have are shared by many! Most church attendance is down! They are ‘failing’ to meet the needs! I believe your ‘church’ is wherever YOU are! Your prayers will be heard no matter where you are! Do ‘enjoy’ Easter!


  3. I debate about “God”, sometimes leaning toward agnostic, but never atheist. I believe there could be a God, but he’s not that interested in me. I’m just a tiny speck in a world of billions. How can He care about the outcome of a sporting event where both sides are invoking His power to win? Really? If He does exist, it’s to be the grand architect of what is going on around us, the Big Picture. Are we to be humble and realize our place, yes. Just because I don’t go to a brick and mortar building doesn’t mean I have to live like a “heathen”. There are still basic laws of morality, and personal respect.
    Sorry, your discussion with your parents is much like mine. they say I need to stop being mad at god, and stop blaming him for my problems. they misread my life. My parents are judgmental, something “Christians” aren’t supposed to do. they always come at me saying they care, but just because it works for them doesn’t mean it works for everyone. When I told them I was going to a more contemporary church, they rolled their eyes and shuddered, like I have to go to their stuffy place and be bored out of my skull by the droning of a boring man in his monotone voice or I’m going to hell.
    I just despise religion. And so did Jesus if I remember correctly. Religion is for control, control of individuals and the masses. Why else would a country leader espouse one religion or another, but for increased control Just look at the church of England. If I’m on my own, reading the Bible, and offering my prayers as you do, moment by moment as the opportunity presents, why do I have to make a show of things in a church where all they do is look down on those that aren’t “dressed right”, or their hair is a sight because maybe they don’t have the same means. Why does it always have to be a fashion show, or a clique thing. It’s just like in high school, immaturity reigns in the guise of Christianity.
    Sorry Miss Becky, I guess you touched a nerve. I do hope your father gets better and comes home. I hope you have the strength to deal with whatever the outcome is. My prayers are with you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I respect your opinion. I’m not much a fan of organized religion either. Why would anyone want to be in a religion that promotes discrimination and hate is beyond me.
      Thank you for your positive thoughts. My dad got out of the hospital yesterday in time for Easter dinner 😊 But he still isn’t well

      Liked by 1 person

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