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Have you ever considered what would it be like to date you?  I did think about it once. It was kind of scary. I think I would be too much too handle. Just too weird. I just want my lover to be happy. Loved. Truth be told, it took me a long time to realize what a horrible person I was. I was a negative mean person. Jealous and had very low self-esteem. Now I try to be someone can laugh with, confide in. I try to be independent, I try not to be indecisive (my pet peeve) I try to keep my assertiveness low key. I dont care what others think, I dont need their validation.

If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?  I would like to know my purpose. Am I supposed to make others happy, inspire others? That is how I would like my future to be. I would also like to know the truth about myself. Knowing the future I think would be dangerous, because then I would do anything to accomplish that.


7 thoughts on “A DEEP QUESTION

  1. with regards to dating – i think you are one hot hot hot sexy lady and any guy that you fancy will be lucky to have you on his arm – indecisiveness and low esteem just show that you have not been loved enough – there is someone there for you and you will find him provided you believe that you will 🙂 – with regard to the truth about yourself – you strike me as being a kind and sensitive girl – one that would love to be nurtured and cosseted – that may well happen in time but in the meantime i believe that you should go on with your general thoughts of continuing to be kind (sometimes grumpy 🙂 ) and treat others as you would like them to treat you – i hope you have a lovely relaxing sunday – very best wishes alan

    Liked by 1 person

    1. wouldnt it be wonderful if others looked at me as you seem to see me? Reading your comment made me realise how spot on you were with your insight. It is ok to be independent, but every once in awhile I want to feel reassured, affirmed and comforted.
      I hope your weekend is going wonderful, and you are enjoying it!


  2. I’ve thought about this as well, and now as I look back on a previous relationship, I realize I did date myself, the girl from Syracuse, NY; the one that I wrote a story called bareback about. She and I would send porn pics back and forth all day long with captions like, “Do this to me” or “I’d like to try this” or “How’s this girl look?” or I love it when you do this to me” or “I’m not sure I could do this, but I want to try”. when we got together, sex was amazing; whether it was vanilla sex, or something down and kinky like I just came in her and then I gave her oral afterwards. I miss her. I think I picked wrong, but its all too late now.


♥writing was all I had, all I’ve ever had, the only currency, the only proof that I was alive. Memory.♥ each of us has a story to tell. Leave your thoughts. Leave your comments.

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