When I was younger it used to bother me when people especially relatives would ask when would I get married, did I have a boyfriend, how come I was still single, didnt I want babies?
Sure.I had everything planned out. I had stars and hearts in my eyes. Was I ever such a romantic young one. I was going to marry my high school sweetheart have 4 children and that was it. Ha!
What high school sweetheart?!
I have had some relationships. Not serious ones.
There were lots of disastrous blind dates.
A lot of talk about matchmaking.
Now there were serious awkward moments!
WHEN THEY TRY TO SET ME UP WITH A COUSIN:
The other day, the kitchen crew were poking fun at me. Trying to set me up with one of them.
I grimaced. “Ugh about no!”
AJ sighed. “Nice Rebecca, I like how you responded like that. Ugh About no!” he mimicked me.
I frowned. “AJ, I cant go out with him he is my cousin!”
AJ looked at me looked at the guy in question and shuddered. “Oh my god that is disgusting!”
I laughed. “You need to work on your matchmaking skills ok!”
That was not right!
WHEN I TRY TO SET HER UP WITH HER BROTHER
Later on that day, the girls in drive thru were poking fun at me. How come I wasnt married yet? Blah Blah Blah.
“Alright, Megi I have an arranged marriage for you!” I teased. “It is Avi” one of our co-workers on window.
She turned her head to look at me, her expression of pure horror. “No he is my brother!”
My jaw dropped, my head whipped around to stare at Avi. Then back at her. “What?” I was flabbergasted. “He is not your brother! You are pulling my leg!”
“He is my brother!” she cried.
“Megi you cant marry him! That is illegal in Canada! My god what were you thinking! You cant marry your brother!” I cried.
Megi stared at me, she didn’t know if I was joking or not. I started to smile. We burst out laughing. “Rebecca, it is illegal in India too!”
“Shoot, there go my matchmaking skills!” I sighed.
While I enjoy the laugh I have with my friends at my expense, I am sometimes envious of their relationships. Other times I am glad I don’t have the drama.
Sometimes I also find it awkward when men are drunk or stoned and they ask me out. If they need drugs or alcohol to have the courage to ask me out how they will handle me when they are sober? Or how will I know if he is being serious?
This isnt self-esteem issues it’s being able to trust he will be able to remember what he did or said hours later.
One of my regular customers drove up to my window.
I was so surprised to see him. I hadn’t seen him in a year. “Jason, how are you?” I exclaimed with a smile. “I haven’t seen you in awhile!”
“Good,” he had a goofy smile on his face.
“Have you been busy?” I asked.
“No, I am getting shit faced.” he admitted.
Oh-kay. And he was driving too. Grumble. I have severe anxiety when it comes to driving. (i was nearly put through a windshield when I was a little girl)
After some useless small talk, Jason suddenly blurts out “Do you wanna go on a date.”
I was so bewildered I thought I didn’t hear him right. “oh?”
“Do you wanna go on a date?” he repeated.
I frowned. “I thought you were married.”
He laughed. “Married?” He sighed. “Fuck no!”
I was sure he was. He has a son. Oh well. To appease him I said ok. It wasn’t like he would remember right?
Jason drove off and I was left shaking my head.
Maybe I do have high expectations, or I am totally clueless.
I will always be the Queen of Awkward Conversations and Moments. Single forever.