QUESTION MY MORTALITY


This week marks the 1 year anniversary of my cancer journey. My surgery to remove my tumour.

The tumour was 20 cm, and had exploded once the Doctor tried to lift it out. She said it was so heavy cement like that she had to scrape everything out.

I feel kind of guilty because here I am happy and so joyful of being healthy.

I follow numerous ovarian cancer Instagramers. I am in awe of their courage and motivation to fight.

I feel silly for wondering am I survivor when my treatment was so easy compared to others. I feel so stupid for wondering all these questions about my cancer, is it in remission, etc

All those questions fade when I learn about someone else’s diagnosis. I don’t know how to respond, how to comfort them. During my treatment; I would become annoyed when I would see the sadness in my friends eyes or hear “I am sorry”

why? Couldn’t they see how much happier and healthier I appeared?

this past week my friend’s mom died of cancer. I’m not sure of what kind. She died within a month of being diagnosed.

Then yesterday a lovely elderly woman; who was having treatment at the same time as I, died.

It certainly made me question my mortality.

10 thoughts on “QUESTION MY MORTALITY

  1. A few years ago I stopped by to say hi to a friend while waiting for my car to be serviced. His business is very close to the car dealer. I hadn’t stop by in a year. When I walked in and asked for him, the two men in the entry gave me a weird look and told me he had died of cancer two months earlier. That was a shock. And here I am a two time survivor. We are mortal, and we can count our blessings.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. While I was looking up Scott’s obituary, a came across the obituary of another friend who I hadn’t seen in years, but she, her husband and Scott had been really close many years ago. She died about a month after Scott of cancer, also. I contacted he husband and we got together for a nice “chinwag” as the Brits like to say.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Enjoy each moment you have, it will never happen again. I’m so thankful you are still with us. Many of my blogging friends are not and my heart breaks each time I think of them..at the same time,I am also thankful I knew them.

    Liked by 1 person

♥writing was all I had, all I’ve ever had, the only currency, the only proof that I was alive. Memory.♥ each of us has a story to tell. Leave your thoughts. Leave your comments.

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